lower and lower

So, this idea came up from the thought that .. “why prostitution seem so wrong???”.

Someone says because it’s just morally wrong no matter if it’s the oldest profession in human history or nah, someone says it’s so bad because it destroys happy family, another one says it’s human trafficking. (this one makes 0 sense though,) but yeah anyway it’s apparently not very graceful behaviour to buy or sell sex, someone who pays, or who gets paid or anyone who’s not related.. They just don’t want to let people know that they do this, it should be very discreet. It explains very well why people use fake name when they book a girl, why girls don’t want to use their picture without blurring face etc., People are willing to pay for tasty food, good massage (not a happy ending one), and nice hair cut, but why not sex? it’s same “service” though…

It actually, doesn’t matter. If most of earth population think that way, let them think that way. I was so curious since when I was little and I still don’t get it. But what can I do??

If think about it logically, it’s because “non-working-ladies” hate the fact that “working-ladies” could take their pussy power over from them. I’ve never seen a guy claims that prostitution is wrong..ㅋnon-working-ladies have more social forces since they are OK with reveal their identity. Guess there are almost same amount of working ladies and nonworking ladies in Sydney (with a bit of exaggeration) though, seems like non-working-ladies still have more power than working-ladies.

For instance, recently one WL went back to her country all of sudden. The reason was, there was a customer who regularly visits and sees a particular girl. They message sometimes likely other client-WL relationship. He got caught from his wife. Wife threatened WL as “I’m going to call your family and I’m gonna destroy your family too like what you did to me”

WTF seriously

I know I’d very angry if I find out same shit, but It’s.. not WL’s fault, yeah maybe she shouldn’t have given her number, duh, but what I’m trying to say is, WL surrendered, ran away eventually, because it’s better lose than let family members know that she’s working lady. Why can’t we just call to mum and say “hey mum, I’m selling my pussy these days, blow job? of course, it’s part of the service.” ?

I don’t know, more than that, I don’t care. again, I can’t do anything about it. let them hate this!!!!!

I don’t care why this is so bad in(with?) social aspect but I can make a hundreds thousand of list why it’s bad for individual, more specifically for working lady. I was once working lady, and it seems fucked my life. It changed my perception of life, (I’m going to be talk about only bad side in this article, However, there are of course good side too.) it’s not scientifically proven facts. just let you know… it’s gonna be very subjective. **a highly subjective point of view**

Duck! hate my self I’m shovelling down peanut butter now. it’s 11:55pm people!!!


1. Low“er” self esteem

I already had the lowest self esteem. No one told me that I’m pretty, smart, or at least deserve something. in my life. My mom was too pretty and whenever I was with my mum people goes like “ehhh… maybe you are adopted!”

the fuck?

I wasn’t this slim, I wasn’t this pretty.(hinting that I’m prettier now 😉) I recall, there was a guy, from Melbourne. He kept telling me that I’m BEAUTIFUL, I was like




not because I’m humble, I.. I literally didn’t know how to react when people say that I’m beautiful, when people flatter me, or compliment me. He seemed to be tired , and frustrated to repeat same word. I tried to break that awkward moment, so answered in a low whisper, “bull shit”. Well, I was trying to be funny (people instinctually trying to be funny when it’s super awkward, aren’t they?)  but yeah.. , it killed his mood, We started talk deep-shit. Until few years back then I didn’t know that I need to be appreciated about their honest. Now I’m OK with say “thank you” but unless I met him and had that deep talk, I’d be still like

wait, isn’t it good? I think I was going to talk about bad things… mm.. yeah I had low self esteem anyway, but working as WL made low”er” self esteem. For instance

When you are not picked from line up, anyone else are picked, but you. that’s … depressing… I got paranoid unless I was chosen more than 3 times in a low. It’s funny how “human pug” in Korea has transformed to  “I need to be chosen in 3 times otherwise It’s not a day today”.. ㅋㅋbut anyway, If you already know that you’re pretty enough, you’re be loved one, deserve good life then that’s find. The problem comes when you know more about your flaws, tiny tits, wide pores, such things…

Whenever people don’t pick me, I got paranoid like, “I better get boobs job. It’s like investment, so I can make much more money later than I spend on my boobs” or “The fuck are they retarded? why not pick me, I am like the best looking here, they are ugly!!!!! WHY NOT PICK ME HUMAN” even though now I think “look” isn’t the most important thing when customers choose the girl. it’s… just click. So then I became super-superficial woman. I thought my face and my cloth represents me the best, spent so much money on sephora and all luxury stuffs, very likely working ladies.ㅋㅋㅋ Never had luxury Items before, and “buy such things” gave me instant euphoria. When I wear it, felt like I have super power so I can flirt all the guys in the world, I looked so pretty because of items not because I am pretty. Anyway, now what’s the point again? eh…. yeah self esteem.

Ambivalence. One day you are told that you’re gorgeous. They buy you a flower, food, even bags and shoes only because you’re pretty and young. One other day no one picks you, no one even reply your text, they all seem busy except me. stay alone waiting room, what I can only do is just hate myself.


ps1 I’m going to wedding tomorrow, so I finish for now here. I know it’s such a shit excuseㅋㅋㅋ don’t judge me!!!!!! I’ll continue when I feel like 😉 as usual.. ㅋ


ps2 you know I wasn’t really feel like write something but I was afraid that people don’t come and read my blog any more, so I force myself to write 😞 inspire me, let me know what I should write. don’t leave me alone, please bother me forever


13 thoughts on “lower and lower”

  1. Here is an inspiration.
    Read your previous posts.
    Finish all the loose ends you said you would finish 🙂

    There are some good topics there.

  2. Here is an inspiration.Read your previous posts.
    Finish all the loose ends you said you would finish 🙂
    There are some good topics there.

  3. Have you ever had a job outside of this industry here?

    Have you dated people who aren’t from this industry or men who don’t know your past working life?


  4. Have you ever had a job outside of this industry here?
    Have you dated people who aren’t from this industry or men who don’t know your past working life?

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