After report – wedding

*picture caption doesn’t work on your phone. so I edited it.
 

1. First and foremost, most importantly, the people’s attitude toward me has changed. definitely.

when I was early 20’s

early

when I was mid 20’s and having late-puberty

mid

yesterday

now

May be because

1.good vibes
2.new hair colour
3.I felt like this but actually they are same

Funny thing was, I even delivered some sashimi and rice cake from ceremony to reception, with someone who I’ve never seen so is totally stranger. Only because I was there and so he was, groom’s dad asked us to help.ย ๐Ÿ˜ณ

I was like “Ok.. this gonna be super awkward.. let’s brave myself.” But it wasn’t that bad. I mean, drive an hour with total stranger who doesn’t know my past. could be, very … uncomfortable. I always thought that I’m super awkward person. (believe or not) However!!! Now I know why some girls and boys, attend to EVERY SINGLE wedding LOL

It’s like group of blind date. They dress well, no one comes wedding with hoodie and sneakers. They all look good and trying to be behaved as well, and you never know who you gonna meet! it’s maybe your friend’s friend, maybe someone you knew before, or maybe someone who you don’t know at all.. that’s .. kind of excitement, thrill, what else.. anyway It’s kind of fun thing.

Problem was occurred after half an hour. I was ok, ok with him since he led the topics, how life goes, what you like etc.. and He.. He just nonstop.. talked to me.. I was like

“oh hahaha yeah?”

“oh.. really? hehhe”

“oh.. did you? haehehceahebdiqwbiudbiwubf”

something like this.. ended up so so so tired to be with him so I sat far far farrrrrr ways from him when we had lunch.

It happens to me very often these days, and I’m like

“maybe these guys read my blog… so they want to be judged? they want to participate my after report? is that why they talk too much?”

2. I cried a bit ใ…œใ…œ

When the bride sang a love song, while the slide show was playing back ground. The slide show was made with simple snaps, They (bride and groom) took it when they were eating, travelling, driving, almost when they doing whatever, anything. LOL

That was so lovely of them! I thought I take too many snaps, sometimesย unnecessarily, only because people next to me complained about it ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹ like they say “STAHP Chelsea STAHP!!!!!” But if you like something, and you know if doesn’t last forever, you of course want to keep them for later don’t you? or maybe it’s only me

My ex often, VERY often complained to me that I still keep all my previous boyfriend’s pictures though, I delete nothing of it. I stopped working for him but I didn’t delete all pictures for him ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹

IMG_3447.jpg

**my favourite picture with my ex

Screen Shot 2017-08-13 at 10.03.29 am.png

** My favourite video with my another ex, He played DOTA like there’s no tomorrow ใ…‹ใ…‹

I do not love them anymore, but it’s still fun if i look picture and if it brings me back that time’s atmosphere, memories.

IMG_5804 (1).jpg

**When I worked @M8 ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹

Some people would say I am missing my old days, if I spend too much time on just looking at old pictures, well maybe, Pictures are slightly more fun because there’s a trumped up narrative. or you can see something what you missed that time. Like

IMG_0023

**I was selfie-ing but didn’t know my pooch looked at me like “tsk tsk”

Anyway, Pictures!
I once was dating with married guy, when I worked @M8, (so much memories M8 days!!) He got paranoid every time when I bring my phone up. I took my food pictures before even Iphone came out.. alright? from when I was little… I’m not taking your shit unless you want. I’ve been taking food pictures, these days I snap, though, anyway The married guy probably worried about blackmail. He always goes like “no not my face, ok?” … or hiding himself from camera carefully, but I knew what he was doing ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹ some people just need to be chill. I mean, CHILL.

Screen Shot 2017-08-13 at 10.35.16 am.png

**I had 4000 food pics on my facebook. I stopped uploading since….. I don’t know prob when I stopped facebook, which is.. ehh…. 2012?13?

On the other hand, I wanted to take picture of him and myself together so bad. I almost begged him, to take one! just one!!! and he refused it like 100 times. What a pussy. Whenever I complained about it, like “CAN WE HAVE JUST ONE PICTURE, TOGETHER” He sent me his own selfie instead LOL, probably because He thought that I can’t use his selfie for blackmailing. I can fuck him up anyway if I wanted so, but seriously, blackmail to who, and why… I dumped him at the end of the day, and blackmail was maybe his dream ใ…‹

IMG_4727.jpg

** Me chillin @surfers paradise, 2013. Guess thoseย havaianas were like my 127thย havaianas, I broke one more last night, so I need to buy 15042th havaianas tomorrow.

Anyway, It’s just so depressing that I don’t have any pictures of him and me.

3. Alcohol

You know Korean-drinking = 0, but it’s not so fun for me. I actually tried many times to drink, when I was younger, because like yoga. (yeah that yogaใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹) if many people enjoy to do something, there must be a reason. so I tried many times but never succeed. again, like toga

lucky I don’t drink at least. imagine If I’m like dumber than now…..

Hanging with people who drink, is fine. it’s fun,

Screen Shot 2017-08-13 at 11.19.08 am

I like to see someone is changed, from the state of prude to honesty. It happens most of the time before and after sex, before and after drink, or drugs, maybe.

I judge people by their attitude before and after sex. That’s fun part of having sex. People change, either good way or bad way. Anyway.. guess I missed topic again? don’t you think it’s too long for just one blog? should I cut half and make it after report (2) ?

Many people who I met for the first time, especially Koreans, fucking kimchies, think I’m drunk all the time. or I’m on something. so I’m high. That’s funny, becuase they think Alcohol and drugs can change people differently, from like “normal”(from their point of view) and still doing / drinking it. ใ…‹ใ…‹

4. I’m finally sick!

Guess because I met so many people at once and they all talked too much and also we shared food!???!! but It isn’t that bad, I mean getting sick isn’t that bad because I thought I’m like an alien since I never sick from…. I don’t know.. from when I broke my ankle?…(was 2015)

When people, (mostly working girls) said “I’m sick so I can’t work today”ย I always thought that why people so sick always, like.. how sick is not-able-to-work-sick, having sex isn’t that bad compare to labours, or normal office work because it’s anyway happening in bedroom? Stop lying, be honest and tell me you “don’t feel like” work, not “can not” work.

I mean, Having mild fever, headache and feeling unwell (because of your damn MOOD) I don’t count these things as SICK. so I barely sick. If it’s moderate amount of sick, I don’t call it sick. However, If I call it sick, that’s real sick LOL

I have a big scar, on my lower back because I had surgery when I was.. 16 years old. Once I told to my mum “my left leg is weird” and she goes “because you sit all day long in front of computer, go get some fresh air, do some exercise, then you’d get better”

It got worse few month later, and I told my mum again “hey it’s worse now? it’s very uncomfortable” and she goes “it’s growing pain I guess? you becoming tall girl ok? and don’t forget to do some exercise.”

and another few month with that such a unpleasant sensation, I finally became a cripple.

I woke up and couldn’t even sit up because there’s no power from my lower back to my left toe, or serious pain like electric shock all over my left leg. About half year I was like couldn’t sleep because it hurts so bad, walk weird because it was uncomfortable, but I thought my mum knows everything, so I just thought “yah it’s fine” ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹ mum.. they know almost everything but not about “herniation of lumbar disk”

I’m not saying that I’m a no-fuss-woman but still, If i say it hurts, it does hurt. If I say I’m sick, I am really sick.

I would end up seeing no dentist unless vitamin talked to me. Toothache, like other aches, they come and go. nothing stays forever. or you just get used to that pain. You think you got over your ex, 100%?? I don’t think I’ll get over my ex until I die. I’m like just getting used to the feeling, that I miss him. so I miss him still but I don’t miss him like before. you follow me? ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹ใ…‹ I’m not saying I still love him but it’s sad I don’t want to talk to someone who I loved so much in past… well. you know you are emotional as fuck when you sick

Like life

once a while you think life sucks, and found one that you like. Life seems โค๏ธOKโค๏ธ so you forget about somewhat you’ve been suffering from. After a while another life crisis, maybe same one, that you forgot about, hits you so strong, maybe stronger than before, and all you need is looking for another one to help you to reduce that pain! like so… no pain is forever, means that nothing anyway is forever.

Everybody have that moment that life goes like

“CEEBs”

feeling really uninspired,

nothing came up on my head

don’t feel like doing anything don’t feel like going out and seeing new people

so I decided to go wedding even though the groom isn’t that close friend of mine.

and fuck yeah I’ve got great consequence that

I’m sick so it’s ok to not doing anything!

My tonsils are swollen, I discharge, lost appetite (this gets serious) and mentally exhausted. but overall, It was good wedding!

I’d give 5/10 to this wedding !โค๏ธ

Comments 17

  1. Anonymous 15/08/2017

    Your life is an amazing story Chelsea. Its always a pleasure reading your blogs and getting an insight into your world.I don’t think your post is too long, you kept me reading the whole time and I love your photos.
    I agree with you, photos should be kept and cherished. If you like something or someone it should be preserved and even if you don’t love someone anymore the photos are always there to remind you of the good times in your life. I too don’t have any photos with my ex since she didn’t really like photos in general. All I have is a couple of photos of her that she sent me when she was overseas. Its kinda sad though that I didn’t realise this until after I she had left, otherwise I would have been more keen to take photos.
    Keep it up.

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