It’s humid and hot here (compare to Sydney it’s not too bad honestly) so drink tones of water, juice, coffee, smoothy whatever it is, drop by so many cafes to just use toilet, or charge my phone. Didn’t bring phone charger lololollolol
Life seems easier if you believe something strongly. Have been reading about hinduism little bit since local people in Ubud they do interesting things such as wearing bandana-look alike hat instead of helmet (called u-deng or something) banana leaves altar everywhere, pray in cute way (like splash water with stick that looks like from fairytale, put flowers and sweets on altar) I may never understand what they do or I don’t want to wear that weird hat (just not my cup of tea, and also it’s for men) but they look happier than me. I always feel like something is chasing me, anxiety attack out of nowhere, useless solicitude, fear about uncertain future but people in ubud are too nice and has such idgf attitude (you can easily feel from their driving style) which i love. I care too much about everything.
Is this because they think
God will do something and we just follow him/her!
So if any good thing happens they would be like hell yeah it’s because i pray everyday and if any bad thing happens they would be like it’s punishment, i’ll pray harder and it’ll get better.
Something like that? The unknown world… religions!
And also have read some about relationship between hindi and yoga. It’s… it’s uncomfortable. It took a month i copy instructor’s ommmmmm- . I do well now though, it sounded like an heretical incantation for noob yogi 🙁 now i do well because i like that feeling, when you fully exhale (more likely squeeze all air out from your lung) so you can breath fresh new oxygen in.
I can finally do head stand yet perfect, first day in Ubud I succeed at once and i was like hell yeah is this because i’m in Ubud!!!!! And second day i never succeed 😭 (tried over 100 times after fell fell and fell again) and i was like why though, whyyyy i did well yesterday!!!!!
Thought about reasons,
Success day : i wore skins’ A400
Fail day : i wore Hawaiian trunk
Success day : He plays guitar at the end of the class and it’s so relaxing
Fail day : He sings hindi song (he’s white tho) and i’m scared, it must not but sounded like cursing spell. he’s hair style is like full mohawk as well.
3. Success day was just one lucky day.
But I do ok after 3rd day. I wear swimmer, sometimes i wear nothing and without teacher i can do alone. Maybe 2nd day i was just tired.
We should aware this whole industry is designated to make people addicted. It’s worse than gamble or drugs. It feels good when you win big or high but it feels better when you achieve something you’ve been trying hard.
Headstand, hands-stand, crow pose dancer pose any poses that look cool but people normally can’t do in a day.
You could, train yourself in your place without any tools(mat, blocks and straps etc) or cloths. But tell me who does that?
Look how much they make, lululemon, manduka, any yoga teacher training centre, it’s all about money but yeah i’m one of those who’s addicted so bad.
Who ever forced me to inhale and exhale after i’m like 5? Whole my life i thought that
Sigh=showing/revealing my anxiety/worry
Showing my anxiety = showing my very intimate part
Showing my very deep inside = people can attack me easy
So I never sigh-ed in front of people. Then I learnt how to breath deeply for the first time ever in casual yoga class.
Who ever forced me to close my eyes and feel my eyes, nose, lips and any other parts of my body ever since I was born? It’s like official nap time in kindergarten when you’re 5. After long stressful day, hot sweaty session, you have 10 minutes forced meditation time and i’ve seen many people fall asleep in that 10mins.
Anyway, it’s 5th day and tomorrow is 6th day of being unemployed. I never understood why people like to be floated on swimming pool, you know it looks boring right
I did that 2 hours today and i am burnt out so bad. It’s so relaxing i never know, like i never know too how good doing nothing is.
I wrote this shit blog with my iphone (did not bring macbook! Also phone charger) so my eye balls are about to pop 👁 ✨😭. Sorry if there were so many grammatical mistakes (as usual though) i can’t be fucked to edit it now so i’ll do when i’m back (maybe never ㅎㅎ) but yeah 2 things !
Casual yoga place in ubud