Not writing it down to remember it later, writing it down to remember it now

20. Breathing teaching training (?)

It’s fascinating. Managing someone’s breath in/out is very manipulative yet does require lot of responsibility. Control human’s the most basic, essential need. Life starts and stops with a breath.

18. Every yogi cries at least once while savasana. I can’t forget that moment still, maybe never. That tingling sensation, many many strange colours, champagne bubbles… some people call it as yoga high and yes, it’s like drug. I always chase the very first euphoria but the harder i try, the further i’m from it. I’m jealous whenever i see people cry in savasana.

19. Thinking about death, the greatest fear for me until last year. I thought about it randomly for the first time, every now and then it comes back and back and back and back and back again whenever i’m happy or satisfied. Not when i’m depressed. These days i think about it every single moment, like “isn’t it good time to die now” 🤔 maybe more likely “i wish time stops here and forever” while I’m driving i imagine someone drives from opposite makes mistake and i’m dead in a second. While I’m eating i imagine the food is poisoned so bad so i die in a breath. While I’m doing yoga heart stroke so i’m dead. I always want to die but passively, without pain. If everyone dies one day anyway, why not now?

21. Meditation class !! i am very awkward when teacher says ‘imagine a thing or person that you love the most’ because i don’t have one. Still can’t tell the difference between space out(daydream) and meditation.

Animated GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

One thought on “Not writing it down to remember it later, writing it down to remember it now”

  1. Do you fear death, or just think about it?
    I seriously think DMT will help you.
    It will change your life.

    I get into a paranoia cycle, especially thinking about breathing and heart rate. Social anxiety, performance anxiety, sitting next to people on the train. Life is a complicated bag of nuts and bolts

    Get your ass into a Float Tank.
    It sounds like bullshit and crazy hippy crap, but it is the best shit ever. Seriously dude, go float.
    It will help you with focus, relaxation and maybe even your meditation.
    Or…. it wont.
    But I’ll bet a big bag of shrooms that you will enjoy it. You’ll thank me, I guarantee it.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.